The first 3 steps to supporting your classical student at home:

“What can we do to help our child at home?” 

This is a question I get a lot - and it’s a fair one! Parents should be involved in their children's education, and life at home sets the tone for how students treat their academics. 

Learning to support the habits your student is learning in the classroom can be a daunting task. I look forward to adding to this list in the future, but to get us started, I’ll share just the first three steps to set you on the path toward creating a home life that complements a classical education. 

1. Read what your child is reading:

If this is unrealistic for you either because your child is in kindergarten and you’d like something more challenging than Whinnie the Pooh, or because your older student’s reading list is a bit intimidating, I’d ask that you just read. Read as much as you can. Read with other parents. Read things you disagree with, and ask questions.

I often hear that parents feel they don’t know how to talk to their children about school because they don’t know or understand what they are learning. A student has a whole class dedicated to Moby Dick, but their parents (myself included, I’ll admit) really only know that it has something to do with a man named Ishmael and a big white whale. If this sounds like you, you’re not alone! If you’d like to read what your child is reading but don’t know where to start, try reaching out to their teacher. Most teachers will provide a syllabus for their class that has a chapter-by-chapter schedule for reading. As a parent, you can use this too! 

“Discuss what they are reading and ask questions. Delight in the plot with them.

Experience their outrage at senseless characters. You won’t regret it. “ 

By reading books that are rich in history, you make yourself more culturally literate. That is, you understand more of the events and influences that have led to the world we have today. By reading books that examine virtue, you automatically develop your own. So, even if you’re not reading exactly what your child is reading, there is still so much to be gained by spending your time in good books.

I’ve said it in past posts, and I’ll say it again - what we consume has a profound impact on us. That applies to your child as well, and I would challenge you to participate in that impact. Discuss what they are reading and ask questions. Delight in the plot with them. Experience their outrage at senseless characters. You won’t regret it.  

If you need help getting started. Download my Recommended Reading List: Starter’s Edition.

2. Organize your home with a separate space for reading:

I love reading books about personal development. I’ve read books about reducing worry, learning to stop apologizing for my ambition, and many more. My favorite books, however, give concrete strategies for implementing and maintaining good habits. 

All the books agree: creating and keeping a good habit involves having a dedicated space and time for the habit to take place. I think that folks who work from home will get this one pretty quickly. 

If you sit in the same place to answer emails as you do to eat your dinner, the lines can start to blur between professional life and personal life. Your mind associates specific actions with particular places. If you always eat when you watch television, pretty soon your mind associates television with snacking, and you’ll find yourself hungry every time you sit down to enjoy The Office. 

The solution, then, is to have areas of your house set aside for specific purposes. When I work from home, for example, I work in the same spot. I sit at a desk - not the kitchen counter. When I work out, I follow the same ritual each time. My brain has caught on. When I sit at the desk, I go into “work mode” and feel instantly more focused. When I taste my pre-workout - I start mentally preparing for an intense cardio session. 

The same is true for kids! Babies come to learn that their crib is a place for sleeping, not for playing; that their high chair is a place for eating; and that when mom gets the car keys out it means they are going somewhere and have to put shoes on. It becomes automatic.

Likewise, when you have an area of your home or apartment set aside for reading, it becomes special. More than that - it becomes a part of their day and their routine. They take comfort in its stability and look forward to the time spent there together. My son knows that the chair in his room is for reading. He’s big enough now that when he sits there on his own, he immediately grabs (and then subsequently throws) a book from the shelf. 

Now, you might live in a small space where this seems impossible. I totally get that. When I lived in my apartment in college, my kitchen table served about 8 different purposes. I mean, we had a couch, but that was a tough place to balance 3-4 different books for a research paper. 

You don’t need a whole room or shrine dedicated to reading. To solve my space problem - college Megan (as I like to call my past self) had a chair at the kitchen table that was only for eating and a chair that was only for homework. You might be skeptical - but it worked! It’s how I managed to compartmentalize some of my life and manage my stress. 

So what does this have to do with supporting your classical student? I tell families all the time - the best thing your student can do to reinforce what they are doing in the classroom is to go home and read. Nothing supports literacy like practicing reading. It improves vocabulary, writing style, comprehension, attention span, etc. The more your kids read, the better. 

3. Limit video games and screens. Try these activities instead:

This is a tough one. I know there are many avid supporters of video games and screen time. I hear it all the time. I hear how “educational” games teach children all sorts of things and that video games improve hand-eye coordination. I’ve even seen articles promoting video games on the basis of improving collaboration skills. 

Well, I’m not going to be shy here. I mostly think that’s all crap. There are so, so many studies that link excessive screen time to obesity, increased aggression, shorter attention spans, poor performance in school, and a desensitization to violence. You might disagree with me, and that’s OK.

But here is a fact: Pretty much anything you see on a screen is entertainment of some kind, and all forms of entertainment influence us in one way or another. 

Here’s another fact: Time spent on a screen is time that is not spent on reading, creating, or physical activity.

The irony is not lost on me that you are reading this blog on a screen. So, I should probably reiterate here that I’m talking about excessive amounts of screen time lest I get a flood of emails calling me a hypocrite. 

My tip, though, is to limit screen time as much as possible and really come nowhere near that “excessive” category. I enjoy watching TV as much as the next person. Heck, most of my job takes place on a computer. So, I get it. There isn’t anything wrong with finding a little enjoyment on a screen. I’m also a mom and know that sometimes I need my son to sit still for 20 minutes.

But kids and young adults are in such a formative stage. They are influenced more than us and lack the moderation to know what is bad for them. That’s why we need limits. So, the next time you reach to hand them a tablet, try some of these instead: 

Ideas for just the kids

• Start a scavenger hunt and make modifications to repeat in the future.

• Get outside! Grab some chalk and draw hopscotch or four square. Or, grab a ball and start playing.

• Build with Lego or mega blocks.

• Write a play to perform for the family.

• Make cardboard swords for jousting.

• Teach the dog a new trick.

• Use cardboard boxes to design and decorate your own playhouse or fort.
  

Ideas for the whole family:

• Play a board game.

• Bake cookies or cupcakes and take them to the neighbors!

• Sing karaoke together.

• Play “I Spy” in your house or around your neighborhood.

• Take a walk to the park.